You know you're drunk when...

Just so you know: this page was imported from my old blog. Some pages were rather mangled in the process; my apologies if things don't quite look right.
  • ... The toaster can be considered an acceptable substitute for the ashtray.
  • ... Texting incomprehensible b******s to the big screen in Lux is a Good Idea (TM).
  • ... Your eyes are looking in four different directions at once.
  • ... The neighbour's cat seems like a good person to strike up a conversation with.
  • ... Westlife seem cool.
  • ... curry/kebob/whatever highly unhealthy food seems like a good idea despite not physically having any more room inside yourself after the Nth pint of beer.
  • ... A windchill of -3 degrees doesn't strike fear into your heart, despite only wearing the thinnest of t-shirts.
  • ... "Have another pint!" is an acceptable answer to the statement "I don't feel so well".
  • ... You whisper louder than most people shout.
  • ... Everybody's food in the kitchen is fair game; nothing is safe when you're hungry and drunk.

Any others I've forgotten?

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